Restrictor

Do you know how when you are standing chest- or neck-deep in a pool, how it's harder to breathe because your lungs can't fully expand due to the pressure of the water? That's kinda how it feels for me to be jobless still. So many nice things have been happening lately, things coming together, and yet I can't relax and enjoy it like I should, can't fully inhale.
So, cloaked in that bit of happy, here are some of the nice things. We have moved into our new apartment and have almost all of the furniture already. The apartment is big and pretty nice too, and the furniture is.............adult (except for the cardboard box serving as the TV stand). The best part is that it's been cheaper than expected. I had mentally planned for $5,000 in apartment furnishings, which for us includes all furniture except for a small bookshelf, a small dining room table, a desk, and the mattresses. Because we moved out of NYC with so little stuff, lots has had to be bought, and having a large place to live means needing more things. For instance, we have two bathrooms, which is great, but that's two bathrooms to outfit. I now own a full set of towels that are mostly ornamental, that I will never use myself, and this feels strange.
I don't have a neat ledger covering everything but adding in everything from toilet paper to paint to the big sectional I'm currently sitting on, I think I'm just under $4,000. It's a big number to think about while unemployed, but we did a good job getting nice things so I feel good about it.
On the baby front, I'm happy to say that miss Lula can now turn herself over in both directions. I was watching her on the floor yesterday as she was in the middle of the long process of going back-to-front for the first time. She could get over onto her side pretty easily, and then rotate her trailing leg all the way over pretty easily too, so that her lower body was all facing downward. The big obstacle was her inside arm (if rolling toward her left side, then her left arm). Think about what it takes for you to get that arm out of the way when lying on the floor yourself. I was watching this process thinking about this and feeling pretty sure that she wouldn't have the strength to finish the roll because of the left arm. I am proud to say that she did not give up and kept struggling with it for several minutes (fair question is what does that say about me, that--assuming the endeavor was fruitless--I allowed my 3.5 month old baby to struggle in an uncomfortable position for maybe 20 minutes without helping). All the while I was watching, just seeing what would happen, sorta also waiting for the moment when she cracks and the sounds go from honest struggling with the effort, to full-on cries of frustration. Finally, like most things in life, it just sorta happened, the arm slid under and she made it all the way over. It really was something. To celebrate, in the hours since she accomplished this maneuver, she replicated the feat another 5-6 times. The lesson in parenthood here is that there is no turning back with a baby. She learns and does things like a boat going down a swollen river heading for a waterfall.